October 12, 2009
Parenting in the 21st Century is a great challenge! It's not that the basic principles of parenting have changed, it is that there are so many more influences both in and outside the home competing for our children's attention, loyalty and commitment. Regardless of their age, children, yes even young adults and into adulthood, need structure. Just as we need highway markers, posted speed limits, traffic lights and warning signs to keep us safe and successful in our driving, our children need clearly defined limits and guidelines to keep them safe and successful in life.
Two important principles of parenting are; provide clearly defined limits/guidelines and be a Parent first and a Friend second.
Providing clear limits / guidelines can best be accomplished when we understand the thought processes of our children and what it is that determines their behavior. This can best be achieved by learning and then implementing the principles of Subconscious Restructuring (SR). Through SR we better understand our kids and they better understand themselves. They become less prone to fall prey to unhealthy influences and live more self-directed lives. They become very aware of choices and consequences of behavior. They also learn how to make positive changes in their lives and how to learn from mistakes. As we better understand our children, we can then establish and maintain healthy guidelines and limits to ensure healthy growth and progress in their lives.
Being a Parent first and Friend second keeps familial roles clear and balanced. Some parents try to be a best friend to their children. This is commendable, however, if your child views you primarily as a peer, a door is open for confusion and questioned credibility. We have all had and lost friends. Friends will come and go in life. Parents are there for life! Being a friend to your children is very important. Being a parent first, is most important! Children need parents to be the lighthouse on the shore and the reliable source of guidance that will be consistent and unwavering.
Learn what determines your behavior and your children's behavior through Subconscious Restructuring. Be a Parent first and a Friend second. These are keys that will make parenting more effective, successful and even fun.
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